He can't control his heart either. It thumped wildly in his chest. If his heart were not beating so fast, then he won't have this problem of having too much energy and being unable to control it. Unfortunately, his heart is beating so fast because of all the adrenaline flowing through his body. He can't control that too. Adrenaline is flowing so much because he is afraid.
He is in fight or flight mode. It culminates in having too much energy in his body. The energy within his body threatened to go out of control. No one should wield energy like this. It can damage his body. It is not safe, and yet he is pumping even more Mana through his body.
ƥandasnovel·ƈom He held on to his energy by sheer force of will. There's a lot he can't control already. He can't control his heart, and he can't control his fear, but he will be damned if he doesn't control the energy within his body.
But stubbornness doesn't make everything all right. Having this much energy is having its consequences whether he can control it or not. The strain is making his body shake. His mind is fraying at the edge despite keeping things together. He is losing it.
He didn't let go though. He just knows that he has to fight. He has to fight, or all is lost. So he continued to run forward. He has to find them. He must find them now and use all the energy he has to fight them. It is his part, and he must not fail.
His determination helped to hold him together mentally and physically, but its effect was minimal compared to his anger. He is angry. He is so very angry. Being angry is good. The anger helped him maintain focus.
It is dark all around, but he can see with his glowing eyes and with his divine sense. They are currently in a forest. There are more ocular monkeys like him with bright eyes, all running towards the same thing. They are his brothers and sister-in-arms. Joined together by a common goal. A goal that only death will stop them from. And he is at the head of the group, so he can't stop. He must not stop for anything.
His eyes continued to burn with a blue glow fueled by too much Mana and maintained with anger. He is so focused that he almost doesn't feel his serious injuries. A missing arm is a very serious injury. It makes him feel a little off balance. That is something that focusing cannot help him ignore. Still, he made sure to step forward surely, or he would fall behind.
He created footholds in the air with his abundant Mana and stepped on them instead of the forest floor. Then he put one foot forward, followed by the other. Slow and steady, they say, wins the race. One foot after the other, when combined with a rhythmic breathing pattern and overflowing Mana, does not create a slow mana entity. He is bolting through the forest like a passing gale. If not for the forest trees that he has to watch out for, he would be even faster.
His narrowed as his divine sense spotted a tree. He had to swerve a little to avoid it, so his speed dropped. Having to avoid the trees is delaying him, and it is not good. It is preventing him from venting all the pent-up energy within him. His energy overload problem will ease off if he is allowed to actually use his energy to its maximum capacity. Unfortunately for him, it is dark, so he has to be extra careful. Too fast, and he would slam into a tree. That will be bad right now. He mustn't stop for anything.
If it were in the daytime, he would be able to use his eyes to see better. His divine sense is very accurate, but it has a very short range of 100 meters. That's a distance he can move in a second or less. If it were daytime, his less accurate but farther-range eyesight would enable him to navigate the forest better. After all, they are not called ocular monkeys for nothing.
It is common sense that it is a bad idea to fight at night. But they had no choice. He is angry because they have no choice. It is another thing that he just has to do. They had to attack at night. They were the ones to initiate the attack, and yet they were the ones struggling. They ambushed their enemies at night, and yet they were struggling. He is so very angry that they are struggling.
He thought to himself in anger, 'One shouldn't have only a single choice and yet be failing at the only choice they have. It is not fair.'
Their enemies can see very well at night better than they can. In fact, their enemies can track prey better at night than during the day because of their ability to sense heat signatures from living creatures. So it is obvious that the ocular monkeys didn't choose the nighttime to attack because of the advantage of visibility. They chose the night because it is colder.
The cold affects their enemies. Their enemies can see better, but they are sluggish at night. Their enemies are sluggish, and yet the ocular monkeys are still struggling against them. It is a pity. It is also unfortunate, but he cannot stop. He must not fail, or they will all fail. It is his part, and he mustn't fail. That's what he kept telling himself that.
He is not the only one running forward. He can see them. His comrades are also rushing ahead. They are members of his squad. They used to be 100. Now they are 42. They faced a hurriedly mounted defense from their enemies and overcame it. They lost 58 of their members to the 60 defenders. It was a victory, but it was a shameful victory.
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