Volume 4, Chapter 71 [Ending List]
From the slit where the blade entered his skin, shallow and sharp, life was leaking out.
Fresh, gushing blood dotted the green grass, while Subaru’s body reflexively convulsed under the watching, purple-haired youth.
Turning up the whites of his eyes, foaming at the mouth, mass volumes of blood spouted from his mouth and neck. Gradually, the intensity of the bleeding waned, until, hearing a sound like a sigh,
{――――}
Subaru clearly understood that his past self had died.
It wasn’t because his present and past selves shared the same senses. But still, the vivid sensation of his neck being sliced open resounded without end within Subaru’s disembodied consciousness―― and soul.
[Julius: Emilia-sama, if you would wipe his…… Subaru’s face clean…]
[Emilia: ――――]
[Julius: He would have wanted you, rather than me, to do this. To have it be your hands]
Wiping off his bloodied Knight’s Sword and returning it to its scabbard, Julius muttered to the stupefied Emilia.
At the feet of the fallen Subaru, lying face-up on the ground, the silver-haired girl fell hard onto her knees. Her amethyst eyes were devoid of emotion, refusing to accept reality. Nor did she wipe away the teartrails on her cheeks, glistening in the light.
Seeing Emilia like this sent sharp pain gouging into Subaru’s non-existent chest. Her grieving expression brought out the punishment Subaru had refused to see, made it bare its fangs, and scoured away the callous approach he had taken up to now.
[Emilia: suba…..ru]
Her hand slowly crept onto his face, wiping off the blood and spewed contents with her palm. Barehanded, she did not mind the filth as she did her best to turn Subaru’s expression that was twisted in agony into something presentable. And once she finished wiping off the blood,
[Emilia: Why……? Why, Subaru… why did you……]
A question. Emilia asked this empty question to someone who could never respond.
He had neither ears to listen, nor a mouth to answer.
Nothing Emilia could say would ever reach the lifeless Subaru again.
{――――}
Watching this from above, Subaru searched his memories for the context of this new scene.
――It was the second time he battled Petelgeuse, when, unable to resist possession, Subaru’s body was destroyed along with that madman.
Ferris’ magic had sent the mana of his body into a frenzy, overloading his vessels and organs, so his death couldn’t have been called pretty. Blistering rashes covered his exposed skin, and broken blood vessels had dyed his half-open eyes red.
Before being wiped away, the blood from his nose had painted the lower half of his face, and if it weren’t for Julius’ timely coup-de-grace, his death would have been even more grotesque.
But no matter how neat his death might’ve been, it would’ve been no consolation for the ones who remained. Especially those who survived the battle against the White Whale and the final showdown with Sloth, about to set off on their triumphant return to the Capital―― the dejection and regret on all their faces wrenched at his heart.
[Wilhelm: Subaru-dono…… I must beg your forgiveness……]
Dropping to his knees, Wilhelm lowered his head in front of the lifeless Subaru.
Having slain all the Witch Cultists under Petelgeuse’ command, Wilhelm’s expression took on a bitter taste at the outcome of their battle. Of the old Knights of the expedition, some joined in their lamentations with Wilhelm’s, while others punched their fists into the ground. There were even some who teared up from their emotions.
Subaru fell speechless to see his death so mourned.
That was perhaps even more overwhelming than being shown the events after his own death.
[Emilia: Why…… would you go to such lengths to help me? …… Say, Subaru… why did you?]
Setting her hand on the silent Subaru’s cheeks, Emilia went on calling with words that would not reach him.
Witnessing her grief, it was only now, that Subaru realized:
In this world, Subaru had never answered Emilia’s question.
He had never given her his honest answer to the question she asked in the Capital, “Why do you want to help me?”.
And so, Emilia still didn’t know the reason behind Subaru’s selfless devotion.
――Though decisively different from the scene he was shown before, both were the results of his irrevocable sins.
[Julius: The world has long suffered from the Witch Cult, and we have slain its vanguard, Sloth. To the world, this is a momentous accomplishment. ――However]
Looking down at Subaru’s corpse, Julius tapped his finger on the hilt of his sheathed sword. Over and over, as the intervals between the taps gradually shortened,
[Julius: That could not make up for all the sacrifices made to achieve this. ――I would have liked to speak more with you. Natsuki Subaru]
With that pained mutter, Julius turned away from Subaru’s lifeless face.
The knight looked up to the sky, his eyes harboring a melancholy gloom,
[Julius: I would have liked to call you friend]
By the sound of Julius’ exhausted whisper, the world of the grassfields was brought to an end.
※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※
Again, all fell to black, as the returning Subaru woke with a jolt.
[Subaru: ――Dgh, hwa! ……ah, aaah, hah, haaa!?]
He found himself writhing on the cold, hard floor.
The stench of moss invaded his nostrils as he rolled on the ground, immersed in that senseless act as if to escape from the emotions threatening to sweep up a storm inside him.
“What on earth is happening?” was not the question on his mind.
Tumbling, rolling, his inner-ear aching, he was straining his lungs gasping for air just so he could divert a little of his awareness away from his thoughts, even if so only a sliver could be plunged into unconsciousness.
[Subaru: ――ug, guh!]
But even that demeaning attempt to distract himself failed the moment he bounced off a wall.
The collision drove pain into his spine, and he could feel blood seeping from his grazed forehead. Drawing gasp after gasp with his face against the floor, before he realized it, tears were streaming from his eyes.
――Pathetic. Stupid. Hopeless.
Just how many times, and to what extent, would Natsuki Subaru have to crumble under his own weakness?
And just what would he need to do to acquire that heart of steel that could remain unshaken no matter what transpired, and no matter what pain he would have to endure?
He was so weak, so brittle, and that was why Subaru had always――
[Subaru: Pretended not to see it, and averted my gaze…… so is this my punishment……?]
There was no way he had never thought of it.
In some corner of Subaru’s consciousness, more than once, the possibility must have occurred to him.
But even so, the thought never rose to the surface, because he was subconsciously refusing to seek and verify the truth.
For Subaru, who could Return by Death, the moment he begins to consider the existence of worlds after his death―― his entire strategy would crumble beneath his feet.
Everything Natsuki Subaru had hoped to save had left him behind.
Or rather, it was Natsuki Subaru who had left them behind. Pathetically and selfishly choosing to embrace death, Subaru had abandoned those worlds in order to escape to new ones.
If the worlds left behind by Natsuki Subaru’s thoughtless decisions still existed, it would be exactly what he had just been shown.
Through Death, Subaru had sought relief from Hell, and those scenes were what followed.
[Subaru: ――Can’t… be]
Before he knew it, his consciousness began to grow distant once more.
Unlike sleepiness, here, his consciousness was rapidly turning white as if forcibly being severed from reality.
{Witness, a present that was not to be}
Again, the unrecognizable voice whispered in his ear.
“Whose voice was it?” His fading consciousness was desperately asking―― until he realized it.
――Without the slightest doubt, that voice was his own.
In front of the corpse’s shattered skull, a young girl was kneeling.
Having fallen from such heights, no human flesh could survive the impact without shattering. His black hair, along with the contents of his scalp, were splattered over the ground, blooming into a crimson flower of death.
{――――}
The sensation of his consciousness being switched wasn’t surprising anymore.
He had expected this the moment his awareness was forcibly cut.
But what he did not expect was the sight he would be presented with when his consciousness awoke――
[???: Spewing nonsense until the very end…… when nothing… can……]
Fallen to his death, Subaru’s body was sprawled out over the ground. Standing beside him, spitting this out, was a girl with peach-colored hair――Ram.
Her usually impeccable grooming had been flustered, and visible rips and tears riddled the ends of her maid’s uniform. On her face, which she had always consciously kept expressionless, was some unbearably complex and enraged emotion.
Rather than regret for Subaru’s death―― it was closer to fury at this outcome.
Ram violently scratched her head, and turned around.
[Ram: So, was this all according to your designs, Beatrice-sama? You stood in my path just so he could……]
[Beatrice: ――――]
Just as she was setting off her accusation, Ram’s face stiffened as she stopped mid-sentence.
For reflected in her light-pink irises, was Beatrice, kneeling beside Subaru’s corpse. Unworried about dirtying her dress, the girl just sat there on the ground―― while Ram’s gaze wavered, seeing her like this.
[Ram: Beatrice-sama……]
[Beatrice: ――why]
She softly murmured.
Paying no mind to Ram’s existence, Beatrice single-mindedly kept her eyes on the dead Subaru.
Tears were trailing from the corners of her blue eyes, even Subaru could see it.
――Beatrice was crying.
At Subaru’s death.
The fact plunged a knife of guilt into Subaru’s heart.
Feeling the depths of his non-existent eyes heat up from the heart-gouging pain, he wanted to run up to that small, little girl, and say something, anything to her.
Yet he lacked the legs, arms, and mouth to do so.
[Beatrice: You… aren’t, that person…… I know that… at least…… but……]
Her face devoid of expression, Beatrice whispered as if in a daze while the teardrops continued to fall.
Before that heart-rending figure, Ram gave up trying to say anything further. She exhaled a sigh, and turned her scornful eyes towards Subaru’s corpse, and its neck, bent upwards at an outrageous angle,
[Ram: What nonsense… Love us―― you’re truly beyond saving]
※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※
{Witness, a present that was not to be}
※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※
As if the very air was being frozen, a white, misty cold presided over the world.
The frozen forest broke apart at every gust of wind, and, unable to maintain their existence in this mana-starved environment, all was returning to dust.
The trees, the streets, the creatures, and the world all fell to white, crystalline particles in the sweeping gale, as the White End slowly consumed the earth.
{――――}
This time, Subaru was witnessing the ending of the world.
Mirroring the white void that was his consciousness, the world awaited its cold and merciful end.
Except,
[???: ――So, you’ve come]
The sombre voice, quaking the atmosphere as it bellowed, was one of agreement.
Immediately, followed the deafening boom of earthshaking tremor as the impact of the behemoth’s fall reshaped the landscape. Trees snapped and toppled, shattering upon each other like icicles as the forest was wiped into flat, barren land.
The one that flattened the frozen forest was an enormous, four-legged, almost feline creature coated in grey fur.
Half of the beast’s overflowing teeth were broken, while white mists escaped the gaps between its sword-like fangs. Collapsed onto its side, its radiant, golden irises turned to look at something in front of it.
And, with trembling, almost convulsing motions,
[Beast: A shame…… I knew this would happen, and yet I couldn’t change a thing]
[???: ――I’ve more or less grasped what had transpired. Indeed, it is regrettable]
The beast spoke, not to lament its defeat, but simply in knowing acceptance of the truth. And, it was a strikingly clear and elegant voice that replied.
In a world that was ending, that voice did not suffer the slightest loss of vitality or strength. Standing tall and straight, with red hair fluttering in the ivory wind, was a blue-eyed youth.
[Youth: Emilia-sama and Subaru are no longer in this world, I take it?]
[Beast: Lia is sleeping, eternally. A world without that child has no reason to exist. And I, having failed to protect that child, am just as guilty as that man――]
[Youth: So for that reason, you would destroy the world?]
[Beast: I knew that I would be obstructed. But doing so was my oath]
Unsheathed from its dragon-talon scabbard, the glinting steel was pointed at the beast’s snout―― at Puck, in his true form, while, wielding it, the Sword-Saint Reinhard quietly shook his head.
Harbored within his saffire eyes, was a deep, and compassionate sorrow.
[Reinhard: I understand your regret. And I feel the same. But that does not mean you may ruthlessly vent that regret upon this land. Your actions, and your oath would bring chaos to this world. ――And I shall never permit it]
[Puck: Because that would be unjust?]
[Reinhard: Yes, because that would be unjust. ――I am the exemplar of Justice. The sword to rectify error. And thus, I shall slay you here. Great Spirit-sama]
Despite their overwhelming disparity in mass, which side the balance of power favored was too plain to see.
Even Puck, in his true form, failing to marr Reinhard’s unfazed expression, was on his dying breaths. By simply drawing a silver arc with the point of his outstretched sword, Reinhard’s blade would carve the spirit’s existence in two.
Expelling an outward surge of his Swordmanship-Aura, Reinhard was loudly proclaiming this fact.
[Puck: ――kh]
The sound led Reinhard to furrow his brows.
Even Subaru’s disembodied consciousness felt something akin to confusion in his scant emotions.
Brief and intermittent, it was difficult to make out what that sound may be.
Difficult, simply because it was so hard to believe that it was precisely what it sounded like.
[Puck: Kh, kheheh……haha, hhahaha!]
[Reinhard: ――What’s so funny?]
With his throat trembling, and on the verge of death, Puck’s face twisted as he burst into laughter.
Even with his life and death in another’s hands, and having had his actions impeded, Puck was laughing. Unable to fathom his meaning, Reinhard asked this question.
But Puck only seemed to find his reaction even more hilarious.
[Puck: What’s so funny? It’s funny, of course it’s funny. Reinhard, you…… no, what would this upstart possibly know?]
[Reinhard: …………]
[Puck: I remember now. How it was meant to be. It took me long enough to understand it. And, having understood, when I saw how you still don’t know, it’s so funny I couldn’t help myself]
There was something different about the tone and volume of that statement that was completely unlike Puck.
For Subaru, who had plenty of memories of seeing Puck in his cat-form, this was the first time he had heard such malice in his words.
This was different from his loathing towards Subaru and Petelgeuse after Emilia was killed. At that time, Puck was still Puck.
This time, the laughter directed at Reinhard was nothing like what he had ever seen from Puck before, but something else entirely――
[Reinhard: ……I will make sure that there are no more casualties. If you want someone to hate, then hate me]
[Puck: I don’t hate you, Reinhard. You are a hero. And a hero has a hero’s role to fill. I don’t resent or fault you for following your creed]
[Reinhard: ――――]
[Puck: You are a hero, Reinhard. ――A hero is all you will ever be]
At the end of the end, he uttered the most spiteful remark of them all.
With the fall of the last syllable, Reinhard lifted his sword over his head, and in a single flash of his Swordsmanship―― from the glint of his blade’s edge an intense heat shot out.
Cleaving through the air, piercing the atmosphere and shattering the earth, the maelstrom of up-swept mana severed everything along the line of the swung-out blade―― and, as the light settled, the world parted before Subaru’s disembodied eyes.
[Reinhard: ――――]
At the close of the torrential sword-slash, the world that was covered in the white, encompassing cold was born anew.
The parted world was mended, as the spiral of mana faded into a ring, returning to the atmosphere. From the shattered earth, flowers budded and bloomed. The pierced-through air was imbued with warmth, as sunlight peered from the severed sky.
The Sword-Saint’s strike simultaneously brought about the world’s end as well as its rebirth.
――While the colossal beast that was rent by that strike vanished without a trace.
Indisputably present only moments ago, the enormous body was gone, and no indication of its destruction remained.
{――――}
With a shrill ring, Reinhard returned his Knight’s Sword to its scabbard.
The wind caressing the bangs of his red hair, Reinhard squinted his eyes as he looked up to the sky while spilling an all but inaudible sigh.
[Reinhard: ――Felt-sama will surely be saddened]
He whispered, closing his eyes.
{Witness, a present that was not to be}
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{Witness, a present that was not to be}
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{Witness, a present that was not to be}
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{Witness, a present that was not to be}
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{Witness, a present that was not to be}
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{Witness, a present that was not to be}
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{Witness, a present that was not to be}
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{Witness, a present that was not to――}
-=Chapter 71 End=-
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