" I was not ready but you kept having unprotected sex and you do not have to tell me for me to know what you were aiming at, Kian...I was not ready and that led me to take the pills and not telling you???
Because I knew that this was how you were going to react so that's why..."
And for the very first time, he saw in her something he had never seen her. Being selfish!!!
"So you think you did nothing wrong? "
He interviewed. He wanted to know if she felt guilty or at least a little bit of recourse of lying to him like that.
She did not answer him right and kept glancing at him the same way he was doing to her..
And thinking for a while, she realized that there was nothing wrong she did.
All she did was for them to avoid some unwanted problems in the future, they were not ready for to face.
She shook her head in negative and told him that she did not feel like doing anything wrong.
And that was all he needed to hear. She was not the ideal, innocent, naive woman he had been thinking her of.
Tinsley held him back. Kian only narrowed his eyes at her.
"Will you stop leaving and tell me what the actual problem is, Kian??"
"I know we both did something wrong and it was not fair on my part to lie to you but you left me with no choice..."
She tried to explain it to him. He did not speak right away and kept listening to what she had to say.
"So why are you explaining yourself if you think you did nothing wrong?"
He implored her, stopping her altogether.
"I do think I did not do anything that big enough for you to react the way you are doing right now...taking over the whole house as if..."
She said and stopped when she saw that he was being unbelievably silent. It got to her only then that something was more wrong than just that...
"If you are done...then let go of my hand!"
Kian remarked, pointing to her tight hold on his right wrist. It made Tinsley flutter her eyes up at him in a questioning expression.
"There's more to it, isn't it??"
"Apart from making your husband take a fertility test then no?"
Kian replied and it astonished her by the piece of news.
Fertility test??
It made her mouth hung open, not knowing what to say and what not to. He just smiled bitterly at her and pulled his wrist out of her hold.
"Fertility test!?"
"Yes!!! Your lie made me think that something was wrong with me because every time you would get your periods...it made me question my manhood, Tinsley... And you do not have any idea how hard it is for a man to come to that conclusion..."
Kian spoke his heart out to her. And if she still felt like that nothing that she had done was not wrong...he was better off her.
"And still if it makes you think that what you did was justified..."
"It was not..."
Tinsley interrupted him right away, shaking her head in negative. She was nowhere close to justifying her actions.
It was not right. Lying to your husband was never right. Yet she did because she felt like she had no more alternatives to solve it.
"I m so sorry that I pushed you to that stage...You will have to believe me, Kian that I only took to the pills to avoid getting pregnant...there was no other motive to hurt you or anything close to that...I had no idea that you were feeling this way..."
Kian let her speak and for a moment, he even felt like ending all of this and just engulf her small sad self in a big hug.
But then he remained static, right where he was standing. He had given so much power to her over him within just a few months of being together.
And now that everything had happened, it made him think that how wrong it was to give someone...you have not known clearly enough to do so.
He had not many experiences in relationships, not like he was ever into one until Serena Williams and that ended, not good at all.
And for the very first time when he thought of giving it all with not just any woman...but his wife, it did not culminate into one good one either.
Tinsley felt like a slap of emotion upon her when he dropped the news of getting vulnerable and anxious to the point of taking a test to confirm his fertility.
She knew that some of her actions had hurt him bad even though she never intended it to end that way.
She held onto his hand and eyed him with the hope that he was going to forgive her and forget about all this.
She was ready to leave the job and listen to him and if it would make him happy more, she was going to consent to get pregnant.
Because of all this, that had happened today, it only made her think that how important he was to her.
If she lost him, she had no one...no one in the literal sense. That it did not matter how much money or not, that she got to help or not, having a child at the right time or not...everything mattered till they were together.
" I did a few things to hurt you even though I did not intend it to...can we let go of this and start over?? "
Tinsley started. Kian closed his eyes, disapproving of it. He was...he could not just let go of it this easily.
"I m ready to leave working and ready to be the mother of your child...please?"
Tinsley bargained. It only made Kian more disgusted of her self. He was starting to look at her in a different light.
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